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Sunday, February 24, 2013

In Hitchcock’s Words - Sort Of


I hope the new Hitchcock movie isn’t for The Birds. If I do go see it I won’t be sitting in the balcony because I have Vertigo. BUT, if the neighbors get an advanced copy of it, I’ll watch it via my Rear Window; I just hope they don’t go Psycho on me. If they do, I’ll have to go North by Northwest.
The theater I will be seeing the movie has 39 Steps and after climbing all them you will be Spellbound. I’m telling you those steps are Notorious. To keep from falling, the theater uses a Rope as railing. But I did fall, and as I fell I yelled Bon Voyageand Rebecca saved me. However, The Wrong Man was blamed for my fall.Suspicion fell upon him and he was accused of Sabotage. In reality, my fall was a diversion of someone trying To Catch a Thief and the guilty party was The Man Who Knew Too Much. You know him, he always Dials M for Murder and then goes into a Frenzy because he always has issues with his side kick; yes he always has Trouble With Harry. He thought he could trust Harry.
They met a while back while traveling. They started out as Strangers on a Train. They were both performers and talked about how they had Stage Fright but were able to get over it with the help of Marnie, who was Rebecca’s sister. They had a few laughs and realized they had a great love of movies and started talking about the movie which a giant ship sank and if it wasn’t for the Lifeboat, no one would have survived. They talked some more and drank some more and knew beyond a Shadow of Doubt, they would be life long friends. But it wasn’t to be. After Harry was caught he told his friend he should turn himself in and the friend wanted to know why, to which Harry replied, “I Confess“. Harry’s friend was shocked. How could someone he trusted do this to him, but then he realized, Harry was a Secret Agent and he wasn’t so Young and Innocent after all. Harry’s friend ended up skipping town but was apprehended a few days later at a Jamaica Inn.
He was hauled into court a month later on conspiracy to commit murder on a movie goer, but all charges were dropped against him when he showed the courts his dance moves, some of which were Waltzes from Vienna. After his performance he received a big applause from the audience and was approached by two talent agents, Mr. and Mrs. Smith who wanted to put him in the lead role of their new movie Foreign Correspondent. Just as he was going to say yes, he was pulled away by another person. Upon his return he noticed that Mrs. Smith was gone. He asked Mr. Smith where did she go and Mr. Smith he didn’t know; that sometimes The Lady Vanishes but she eventually shows up and not to worry.
Mr. Smith and the man finished their conversation behind a Torn Curtain in the courtroom. Mr. Smith wanted the man to come by his studio, Under Capricorn, to sign some papers, in which the man agreed. Mr. Smith asked the man what his name was and he said Elstree Calling. They shook hands and went separate ways.
What became of Mr. Calling is not known, but Mr. and Mrs. Smith would go on to be big successes. As for Harry, he wrote a best selling novel and ended up Rich and Strange. He married Mary, who was wife Number Seventeen. On their wedding day, instead of giving her a diamond ring, he gave her a Topaz ring and they lived happily ever after.

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